a gift from the parents of my first graders
It just seems so strange that we are supposed to go back to "normal" after a few days when there is nothing "normal" about the situation. Some days I want to scream and other days I just break down into tears for no apparent reason.
To be honest I feel angry. I am angry that my Mom couldn't be there at my wedding two years ago, I'm angry that my family had to be put through the heart-wrenching process of watching my Mom decline, I'm angry that my Mom won't be there to see her future grandchildren being born or watching my sister get married or any other milestones along the way.
I know it's the holiday season and everything is supposed to be happy and bright and jolly but in my life it's not and that's just the way it is this year. I just am not feeling it in my heart- everything about this month seems half-hearted.
But for know I am just trying to accept my new life and try and move on the best we can. Luckily I have some amazing family and friends to help me as I try to figure all this out.